being watched

have you ever felt like you were being watched? i suppose i brought it on myself by creating this thing called a blog, but it's still weird to have people watching you. so many more people read this blog than i would ever imagine. hi everyone!

i don't really have anything intellectual to say. but i guess i could ramble...

i got an mri last monday (11 days ago!) and the doctor still hasn't called me about the results. i have left three - THREE - messages with them asking for the results. should i give up? or keep calling? one of the problems with that is that i don't like to bug people. i know they're busy and they'll call me when they have time. (maybe.) but another problem is that my doctor is my best friend's dad....so i really don't want to bug him. although i will say that i've been very tempted to call him at his house the past few nights....grrr!!!! i'm dying to know if something showed up that's causing this CRAZY PAIN!!!!! going on 4 years...good grief.......

in other news, i'm officially a member of the verizon squad. *sigh* i was with sprint for...oh gosh. seven years. WEIRD! chris and i finally got a family plan and verizon made so much more sense. all of our friends have verizon, they are the only ones that get service in the remote places we go (the nc cabin and nana's...) so we went with them. we got new phones (i have a camera phone now!!!) and i finally have a headset that i LIKE! halleluia! no more switching from ear to ear from the pain holding a phone to my ear causes!!!! and less chance of a brain tumor...right? hmm....

in more other news, this is my favorite picture lately:

i've been saved by my pinchers of power!

the goonies. i feel confident in saying that it is one of the BEST movies ever made. the dialog, acting (well, most of the time), sets and scenery, story line, everything is outstanding!!! we were going to rent it and watch it the other night because nathan has never seen it...pity. on the way to rent it, we decided that was foolishness. so we just bought it. (hooray!) we watched it, and it was bliss.

the princess bride. i feel confident in saying that it is one of the BEST movies ever made. (again? YES!) EVERYTHING is outstanding. one of the local theaters here showed it monday and tuesday night, and i went to see it with some friends. brilliant! people in the audience were snickering and quoting under their breath even before the actual quotes would happen. it was SO much fun.

i got to watch two fantastic movies in the same week! watching movies as an adult that you watched regularly as a child is really interesting. you pick up on new things, understand the plot better, and now i always think "what great writing!" or "what great acting!" the movie that made me realize how good it is to watch childhood movies later in life was mary poppins. i never understood the underlying theme of being a good parent...i just liked the magic of the movie as a child! but it's a really, really well-written movie with an amazing moral.

in other news, please pray for a nameless family. (i don't know their last name!) one of the two just-out-of-college guys that lived upstairs in our building, who had been best friends for years from what we understand, (which is really just a house turned into a few apartments, so we know everyone) died. it's been so much more emotional than i ever thought it would be. we just haven't wanted to be in the apartment, so we've actually been staying with our parents the past couple of nights. sheesh. police were at our place when we got home (like, 7 cars!) and we thought it was a drug bust b/c one of them was sitting in the back of a police car with his face in his hands. but when the cops came and asked us questions at around 11:30, they told us that someone passed away upstairs. when we asked if it was one of the two guys, one of them said "if you look around, you can figure it out..." the one guy is right there, and the other guy's truck it parked on the street...yeah. it was him. when they left, we both fell on our faces and bawled - i mean bawled - for about a half hour. (i still have little blood blisters on the skin around my eyes from crying so hard with my head down....that's never happened before...hello makeup!!!) anyway, i'm really worn out emotionally...why didn't we reach out to him more like we said we were going to? why didn't we invite him to church like we said we were going to at least once a month? what if? why? what if? why??!! oh holy and sovereign God, reach down and pour grace and mercy on his family and friends, and on his roommate (who probably found him dead....)

take this away - when you feel a little urge to do something for someone that seems to be good, but you feel like resisting it because it either takes you out of your comfort zone, or it takes away from time that seems so precious, just suck it up and do it. you really never know how much time anyone has on this earth. it's real. and when it hits, it's really weird. we pull in our driveway and see his truck still parked there, and it's like "weird..." regret...guilt....hope.....peace.

this is the day that the Lord has made. go and rejoice and be glad in it!!!

that your love may abound more and more

you know? life is really good. even though i'm the busiest i've ever been, it is really, really good. i don't really have the finger power to tell you all about it with words, so i'm just going to post a whole bunch of pictures....i think that will be okay with all of you.... :) :) :)

i'm at rembrandts and the connection is pretty slow, which won't mean anything to you as you read this. just know that this post took forever to create!!

i'll start with the most important... and what everyone wants to see....

there it is!! the beginning of alex liner becoming alex walker. WHOA! i'm so PROUD of my dear brother!! the ring is gorgeous and, as alex says, "exactly what i've always wanted!!!"

the story: i got a phone call from my dear and fabulous brother (who NEVER calls me...so i knew something was up) who told me, as you all know, HE'S ENGAGED!!!! he took her up to camp vesper point (of course! where else could it happen!) and he asked her to be his bride on the rocks of the point at sunset. AWESOME!! alex is just the PERFECT fit for him. all these years that we've prayed and prayed for a wife, turns out she was just too young at the time! the timing is perfect. what a great, great couple. i can't wait to see them together as husband and wife!!! and tonight the two of us went to taco night (thank you 79 cent tacos!!) and she (i'm crying in public again...) asked me to be her matron of honor. are you KIDDING ME?!?!?!?! absolutely rock my world. amazing.


and now back to the new year. brian got us a chocolate fountain for christmas! here it is in all its glory for our new years party. MMMMMMMM.........












we all played the most amazing game (it's called "the hat game", which is the WORST name ever. i call it EXTREME CHARADES!!!!) here is chris acting out "fatigue" to lee!











this is chris with his newest toy - a remote control helicopter!! his dad always gets him and his brother a fun toy as a little bonus to regular christmas presents. it's REALLY fun to play with....even if it does look like a creepy giant bug!!!















for christopher's birthday (which is actually before the new year, but who cares?) the two of us went hiking which was AMAZING. we drove to the ocoee - just about 45 minutes away which is not bad at all - which i've never hiked before. this is a LIVING tree. seriously. i marvelled.
















and marvelled. and marvelled. it had real live growing branches and leaves at the top. and this is what it looked like when you looked straight up into it. literally a 360 degree turn!!! it looks like a dragon!! BIZARRE!!!












jency turned 24!!! we had a fun party and had a little too much fun with balloons...we seriously must have played with them for an hour like this. don't let them touch the ground!! keep them in the air!! pound each other with them!! keep going! all at the same time!!!!









then we had a bit too much fun with static....(yes, that is "once" on in the background!!!)













everyone had to try....



















yes. we are adults.....



















no more cookie cake for you, husband!!!














we had an epiphany party (when the wisemen came to see Jesus) at nathan's mom's house! we made gnocchi (a pasta made with literally only potatoes and flour - the steam from the potato acts as the water! here is brian presenting the gnocchi as it is drying.) and then we rolled them into giant worms, cut them into inch long little pieces, and rolled them on the gnocchi boards to make grooves. when you boil them, they float to the top when they're ready! and they are SO GOOD!!! anne's genuine italian sauces help make them the best food EVER!!!




here are the lovebirds....i mean, jency and nathan presenting the gnocchi as it comes out of the water. MMMMM!!!!












RACHEL AND LEE GOT MARRIED!!!! the ceremony was PERFECT! i have so loved getting to know these two, and it was just so great to be a part of watching them begin their new life together!!! i could ramble and ramble and ramble!!!









this is my favorite picture. she is SO BEAUTIFUL!!! (this is her dad...)














colin and caroline are getting married TOOOOO!!! we went to a SUPER fun party for them last month down in atlanta and got to meet all their friends and just hang out. it was so, so good!!










AND we got to hang out and play with caroline's cats, lulu and jackmo. OH MAN. chris and i were in heaven. we both adore cats, and when they have a sea of wrapping paper and tissue to play in, it's a great adventure.

this is my favorite shot of jackmo. he is nothing but mischief!!!













*sigh* i told you life was good. it gets better.


last night we celebrated shoo's birthday, and EVERYONE was there. EVERYONE!!! we had a blast dancing to brad's (emily's new fella!) amazing banjo playing and just sitting around enjoying family.
















katie and chase are living in town preparing for going overseas with young life. i can't believe they're leaving!! but i'm so excited for them! the best part about it all is that katie and kendall are BOTH pregnant!!! WAHOO!!! more babies!!!!!!!!!

look at liza's eyes...i think she's trying to hypnotize me.....








and here is queen alice with her rick-rack crown and robe that matches her american girl doll. :) precious alice gets older and more awesome every time i see her!!! i hope my kids are as cool as the whitmire and crowder clan....i wish we got to spend more time around all of them.











the girls already adore alex. she's going to be the best mom someday!!! and she already fits into the walker family SO well!!

















another SUPER exciting thing about life lately is that kim shomaker gave me some of her TWENTY YEAR OLD sourdough starter to make bread. HOLY SMOKES! we're talking, chris grew up eating bread off of this starter. i've made bread twice - once the regular way and once with whole wheat flour. BOTH ARE AMAZING!!!! i can't believe i make bread - actual bread, not the cake-y kind. chris and i usually eat a whole loaf in less than 2 days. i like being able to give it away. if you want a loaf, let me know and i'll bring you one some sunday! (i bake on sundays...)



now i'm off to play with the video function...can i really post videos????

::::edit::::yes...apparently the video thing DOES work, but it takes truly forever...and i keep getting errors...so you'll just have to wait to see shoo and gege dancing with the girls, and chris, nathan and sami playing and singing the PERFECT processional in rachel's wedding. oh well. :)

FINALLY!

FORREST


IS



ENGAGED!!!!!!

the ways of the weary

well my m&m addiction is over. for now. which basically means that the m&ms are gone and i haven't bought more...and i don't think i will because i'm not really supposed to eat chocolate.....but that's not the point.

last night (and this morning, too!) was hilarious in a sad, sad way. chris and i are both so busy, we're growing wearier and wearier...i shall prove it.

last night, i made soup!!! i was planning on making a quick stir fry with veggies and chicken and rice since chris has to go to his internship. but when he told me that he wasn't going to go anymore (the first move in trying to streamline our time during the week...) i said "ooh! i'll make soup!" those of you out there who know my husband will know that this made him a very, very happy man. and it was a really, REALLY good pot of soup. no recipe. just stuff in a pot. broth, a can of crushed tomatoes, chicken, squash, peppers, green beans, corn, chopped cocktail weiners, seasonings.......YUUUUUMMMMMMMMM!!!! chris was SO excited and was talking about how he was going to take soup to work for lunch the rest of the week! he gets soup EVERY day at work, but now he can have free soup that's BETTER than the work cafeteria!!! but that's not the hilarious, sad part.

then jency came over, and then she stayed and stayed and we talked and talked and it was so very good! around 8:30, i realized i had better get to to making the cinnamon bread b/c it was the day to make it (i'm stuck in a seeming endless cycle of amish friendship bread...) so i started making it. then i realized i was out of sugar. but that's not the hilarious, sad part either.

jency left and chris i went to the store. before leaving i turned the preheating oven off like every good american. we got back from getting sugar and i finished making the bread. i'm breaking my boredom of making the same thing every 10 days by spicing it up a little. this time i used 1/2 cup of regular flour and 1-1/2 cups of wheat flour. and i added pecans this time. YUM!! it's a totally different creature. but, of course, that is not the hilarious, sad part either.

i put the loaves in to bake around 9:15 and was relieved that i wasn't going to but up too terribly late. after 40 minutes of baking, the timer finally went off which meant i could finally forget about it and go to sleep. i looked at them to see if they were done and i said "wow. they didn't rise very much...oh no....you are KIDDING ME!!!!" you may have figured it out already....i forgot to turn the oven BACK on when we got back from the store. BAH! see, it was still hot enough from before leaving for the store to make me think it was on when i put them in. oh you're kidding me.....so i turned the oven on, went back to bed and read for almost an hour. (1 samuel - weird stuff happens in there man..."make a gold modle of the tumors afflicting us...".....WHA???) after 50 minutes of baking, they weren't even close to done. i guess adding the whole wheat flour makes a difference? i don't know. so it took about an hour and a half to bake and about a half hour to cool enough for me to cover them. *sigh*

so that is the hilarious, sad part of my day yesterday and the proof that i am, indeed, growing weary. hilarious because it's hilarious that the loaves sat there for an hour going "um...hello? aren't we supposed to be HOT???" and sad because i went to bed after 11:00 when we normally go to bed around 10. *sigh* i'm sleepy.

the hilarious and sad part about TODAY that proves how weary chris is: he forgot to take soup to work today. ACK!

in other news, iron and wine's new album RULES!!!! (even though the picture scares me a little....)

HELP!!! I CAN'T STOP EATING THESE!!!!

i'm afraid without professional help, i will become a dark chocolate peanut m&m....someone! please help me!

or at least join me in my delicious addiction.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm......

blessings all mine with ten thousand beside

driving in to work today i saw a wreck. i wish i could make a cartoon of how it happened, but i don't have time. i was driving on a two-way road and traffic is relatively heavy but moving quickly in both directions. there are several cross-roads along the way, and they either have stop signs or red lights, and they can all turn left, right or go straight across. i don't know what the actual directions are, but i'll make it up to make it easier. i was traveling north, and a car wanting to cross comes to the stop sign FAST going west. he slows down just barely and then guns it to cross about 50 yards in front of me. there isn't even a tiny break in traffic!! there were two cars beside each other going south and the west-bound car barely missed the closest car but the farthest car basically t-boned him. by this time, they're just barely past being right beside me, so when i turned me head a little to the left, i could see it happen in my periphery. the south-bound car - some sort of small suv - hit the west-bound car and spun around and around, and i think he might have hit one of the post office's blue mailboxes, but i'm not sure. i didn't see what the west-bound car did. i wanted to slam on the breaks to stop and see if everyone was okay, but i knew i would cause another accident. i called 911 and told them about it.

it truly amazed me how i reacted to it. i had a pretty bad wreck back in 2002 in colorado, and suffered from post-traumatic stress for about a year, and now whenever it snows and i'm on the road i suddenly and surprisingly have a panic attack remembering that wreck. and today when i just heard the crunch of metal that is so unique to car wrecks, it all came back again. i trembled and had adrenalyn running through my body with a racing heart for at least two hours after it happened. WEIRD!

AND! my friends who are in ecuador making connections with people for their awesome fair trade business had a wreck! a really bad wreck! no one was hurt by the grace of God, but it really makes you stop and think about what you're thankful for.

i know that Your mercies are new every morning...i know and trust that You know the plans you have for me, and they're GOOD!...i really believe that You are with me always....calm down little lyndsay. *whew* post-traumatic stress syndrome, meet my God of peace! booyah!!!

in other news, i've been staring at the computer for exactly 4-1/2 hours, and i'm CROSS EYED!!! i have GOT to go to the eye doctor...these glasses are not only broken (i'm ashamed to say i'm using scotch tape to hold them together) but they just aren't cutting it anymore....

for your reading enjoyment, i hope that the following lyrics encourage you in some way. really think about the words, and don't let the "thees" and "thy's" get in the way!!


Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not;
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!



**EDIT** I COMPLETELY FORGOT THE BEST THING ABOUT MY RECENT LIFE!!! one of chris' parents' friends gave me some of her famous sourdough bread starter!!!! and i made sourdough bread this weekend!!!!!!!!! IT WAS SO GOOD!!!!!! i fed the starter on friday night and let it sit all night at room temperature. then saturday morning, i mixed together the bread with one cup of the starter (and put the starter back to bed in the fridge). it was a small little blob - about the size of a really big grapfruit - and it rose in the oven all day (just with the light on to create a warm envinronment). saturday night it was HUGE!!! bigger than a basketball!!! i punched it down, kneeded it a few times and divided it between three loaf pans. the little blobs were only about 2 inches high and didn't even cover the bottom of the pans. they rose all night in the oven, and sunday morning i drug myself to the oven, took the towel off to a beautiful sight of three totally full loaf pans!! they had risen and were even pushing the towel up a little bit! ah, the glory of yeast. i turned the oven and timer on, and crawled back in bed. about 20 minutes later, chris got up to get ready for church and left the door open. he yelled "IT SMELLS SO GOOD!!!" and i thought "yeah, it can't smell THAT good..." but when the smell drifted into the bedroom, i couldn't believe it!!!!!!!!!!!! i want to make it every week JUST to get the smell!!!! then we proceded to eat all but about 2 slices of one of the loaves for breakfast. mmmmmmmmmmmm.

i took pictures, but i don't have the camera cord with me....until later.